My Dear Father

I would like to tell you about my father and what he has shown me all of my life.Many things good and bad. Yet, I want to start by saying I love my father very much. We, dont get to see each other very much dues to our lifes now. Doesnt mean I still dont care about him or think about him all the time.

He is a Ret Sgt. for the Air Force of 25 years. He now lives in Michigan. He was born in Indiana. There are many things that I want to say or tell here. One for I think it's important. After reading some of this maybe you will know why I have wanted to say more.

I know that I can't remember way back when I was a little child, but I want to tell as much as I can how much you mean to me. I hope that all of this will come out right. I first want to start saying that we can't pick our parents but "I was special for you picked me".

As anyone that will read this will know what I'm talking about. We, have gone through some really hard times in our lifes and good ones as well. We, are not like other families per say. It's hard to tell you what I mean, but we had this very close bond which I don't like to use this word but we had this in our family.

Now, I would like to tell you about my father that is so special to me. You see my father is my father by choice. He picked me as his child before I was born. I won't go into all it but let's just say that he told my mother.

I will take him or her as my own to raise as my own. He did do this. I always come first when I needed something. I would go up to my father and ask him for something and he would give me his very last dollar. Even if it was his last dollar he had for the day.

I'm not going to say that we didn't have our up's and downs for we did. As most families do. But, I watched my father for many years take care of my mother when she was unable to take of herself. I know this had to be very hard on him. For, 21 years of his life he set aside and watched my mother die. I remember the tears that he tried so hard to from everyone else. Yet, I was living with him. I heard the silent tears at night when my mother left this earth.

Well, now he has moved on with his life. I wish them all of the very best. I know that at first it was very hard for me to handle for he was always just a drive away. It's not like that now. We are a phone call away. I know you'll say its the same but it's not.

My father has done a good job with the three of us children. I know that Tommy is no longer with us, but he is with us in spirit. Then there is John Robert (Bobby) and myself. Both who are my half brothers. But, in my eyes they are my blood brothers for I know no other in my life. Like I said before most can't pick their family but I was and you see I was. So, to me this kinda makes me feel special that they wanted me to be in their family. I only wish that we could still be as close as we once was, but since we all live so far apart this is very hard to do.

I do have to tell you how I was told that my father wasn't my real father. This means alot to me. For, you see this all came from him. It was him that sat me down and told me. This is how it went. I ran away from home sometime ago when I was 13 years of age. When they find me and took me home my mother told my father I think it's time that we tell her the truth. (meaning me) I didn't know what they were talking about.

Well, this is what happen, my father sat me on his lap and said Lucie Anne I have to tell you something. I know that it was bad for I seen the tears in his eyes. I don't think that I ever seen him cry before this. But, by now I knew that I was going to be told something serious. And it was.something that was going to change my rest of my life. He told me the I was adopt but this was still my real mother. Not that he wasn't my realy father doe he had raised me since I was born.

I didn't know what to do to tell you the truth. I don't remember anything but that I gave him a hug and told him that he was my father and hugs my mother and went up stairs. I thought about this for many of days. But to this day I won't think of him as my step father.

Yes, I have said in a fight or something that you are my step father and there was a time that we didn't talk. Which just about killed me. But I would have never told him this. For, you see you don't have to be blood to be like someone. I stayed away from him from the hurt of my mother passing which I know know was wrong. I didn't think was right that he could go on and her not be here anymore.

But, I'm here to say now that I'm sorry to my father. I love you dad and I alway will and I'm sorry that we didn't talk for so many years after my mother passed away. I only hope that the rest of the days that we have that they will be good ones. We can't change what has happen, but we sure can make the best of what we have yet to come.

There is more that I will add to this page but this is what I had to say for right now. I hope that you understand that sometimes people just have to take their time to let go of things that hurt them so very much. May the good Lord be with you two always.

"Updating"
This is a special note about my dad and what he has done for me.You see ever it I wasn't his real child. He was always there for me.Good, bad anytinhg I needed my father. He even listen to me when I told him about meeting my real father.
You know something?
Sometimes it's not a good thing to meet your real mother or father if they were never apart of you life.. you see i found tihs out the hard way. I'm not going t oput it here. But it takes a person that is special to love anothers child!! And my dad did it (I love you very much dad) and miss you even more.

My Father is only "You", I don't know anyone else. Thank you for letting me go out on my own and to find things out for myself. I'm learned that the green isn't always greener on the other side. That one should just stay right where they are.

I hurt my father bad and he never said nothing to me. He say back and waited. Knowing I guess one I woudl come to him or that I had my own life to live. I find out things I wish I never knew. But, it's over now. and I'm sorry right here. God, dad I would do nothing to had you.

You was there whern I was sick, sad, happen and gave me a life of learning to get me where I am today. Please remember dad. I do and always will love you more than anything else.

Thank you "Dad" for given me a life to live. And to teach me to learn somethings on my own. Yet, never being to far away that if you was need stood by my side. How could one now love a man that has done all of them for his child? "I'm sorry dad for hurting "You" I didn't mean to by no means of the word. You'r my one and only father in my life from now til the day i part this life

Your little sissy.
with all of my love,
Lucie Anne